


where's the person that i know?

by artsyleo



Series: comfortember 2020 [17]
Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Comfort, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Injuries, Non-Graphic Violence, Panic Attacks, Threats of Violence, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:53:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27609986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artsyleo/pseuds/artsyleo
Summary: comfortember prompt day 17 - flashbacksbased on spoilers- callum is attacked by thompson, and ben helps him deal with the aftermath
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Series: comfortember 2020 [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1995826
Comments: 7
Kudos: 59





	where's the person that i know?

**Author's Note:**

> tw for referneces to violence, panic attacks, mention of bruises/injuries 
> 
> this isn't actually canon yet, just my interpretation of current spoilers

Once he catches himself in the mirror, he can’t look away. 

Fuck, it looks  _ wrong _ . 

And he remembers all too clearly the last time he looked like this. 

There’s a dark bruise blooming just under his left eye, curling around the side of it and under and blending with the bags under his eyes from the fact that he can’t actually remember the last time he got a clear night of sleep. The cut just over his eyebrow has covered over, as has the one on his bottom lip. There’s a darkness under his chin and snaking down onto his neck and he can actually trace the finger lines- he does, stupidly, memories of terrifying pressure-

_ “I told you, Highway,  _ you _ work for  _ me _. You don’t get a say in this,” Thompson growls out, voice low and terrifyingly quiet right in Callum’s ear, the feeling of hot breath there making him nauseous. The hand just curled around the top of his neck tightens against his jaw and suddenly all the memories of Ben’s hand there, stroking over the skin terrify him. “Phil goes down. There’s no question any more.”  _

-play out in front of his eyes, clear as day. It takes the breath from his chest, squeezes his lungs too tight like there’s a hand around them too. He looks too pale, making the bruises stand out even more and of all the things he could hate Thompson for right now, he hates him for putting the bruises in the same place as Keanu did, all that time ago. 

Because it still haunts him. Still, when he looks in the mirror now, all he can see is that warehouse, those days spent there, and he  _ hates  _ Thompson for taking him back there. Maybe that speaks for itself- that he’s so filled with guilt that he can’t even be angry with anyone but himself for the situation. He realises too late that there’s footsteps outside of the bathroom door, the door that he’s not locked yet, and that someone’s going to find him here, hunched over the skin with his shirt off crying at the sight of his own face- because his face doesn’t look like his own any more. He doesn’t look like the person a couple of years ago he thought he’d be. It’s the exact opposite, and maybe that’s more terrifying than anything. 

Someone pushes on the door, and it connects with his shoulder when he doesn’t expect it, connecting with a bruise-

_ “Now you listen to me, Callum,” Thompson says, hands too hard into his shoulders, pinning him where the corner of one of the notice boards digs too hard into his shoulder. It’s grounding pain, making sure that he can’t just ignore that this is happening. “I gave you your orders. I know you’ve been double crossing me, I know you think you can hide things from me.” _

_ And Thompson fucking  _ laughs.  _ It makes a shiver run down Callums spine.  _

_ “You bring in Phil. I don’t care how you do it.”  _

_ Callum tries to push forward, but Thompson just slams him back again.  _

_ “You bring him in.”  _

-and he finches away hard, pressing himself against the other side of the room. It doesn’t matter that Ben’s the only person in the house right now and he  _ knows that _ , his brain doesn’t seem to function logically any more, just runs on scraps of memories and the fear that’s laced them together. 

His eyes slam shut, irrationally too afraid that he’s going to open them and be back there, see Thompson and his threats or Keanu and his fists. HIs breathing’s gone, lost, and he slides down to the cold floor, curling in on himself and gasping because all of a sudden the room feels too small. The tears that he’s held back the last few days since it happened just fall forward, no hope of stopping them and he just  _ breaks _ , too weak to be bothered that he’s being watched.

There’s a gentle touch to his wrist and he tries to pull away straight away, and maybe it should be the first sign that the person in front lets him go, lets him pull away and have his own space. His heart is beating too hard in his ears for him to really hear it but there’s a soft voice calling out for him, telling him to  _ open your eyes, please, it’s just me.  _

Maybe it’s rationality peeking through but he listens to the voice, tilts his head up so that he can see the man that’s sat in front of him and-  _ fuck, it’s Ben.  _

He’s knelt on the cold floor in boxers and one of Callum’s t-shirts, tears in his eyes and fear on his face, pleading. Callum distantly recognises that Ben asks if he can touch him and Callum doesn’t answer, just shifts and shoves his head into Ben’s neck. 

Arms come to curl around his shoulders, gentle pressure pulling him back together and somehow it makes it that much easier to breathe. It’s just the reminder that he isn’t alone here, that he isn’t alone in this any more and that’s something he needs like he needs air, apparently. Ben must get it, because he holds him even tighter, a hand shifting slightly to tangle in Callum’s hair, stroking through it and over his forehead. 

He doesn’t know how long they sit there, but it doesn’t matter; time loses meaning when he’s held in Ben’s arms, because that seems to be the only place he feels safe right now. He reckons that’s something he can deal with, though. There’s much worse places to be than held in the arms of the man that you’d do anything for. 

**Author's Note:**

> so WHAT ABOUT THEM SPOILERS THO? I dont know about anyone else but I, as you will know if you follow my tumblr (@artsy-highway), am very excited about the current way this sl is going and the spoilers that have just been released, so i wrote this bc i love to write angst, my apologies :)  
> anyways, comments and kudos mean the world to me, and i hope you all enjoy, lots of love  
> leo x


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